He or She, or They – A Singular Conundrum

Source: Pixabay/Geralt CC0 Public Domain

In this age of Political Correctness (which in truth is a form of censorship) it is no longer considered appropriate to use the masculine pronoun ‘he’ when referring to a person of unknown gender. This has led many writers and speakers, myself included on occasion, to adopt the clumsy wording ‘he or she’ and its equally clumsy cousins ‘him or her’ and ‘his or hers’ when referring to someone whose gender is not known.

The issue, it seems, is that the English language has no good singular pronoun to use when describing a person of unknown gender, or so I thought, until I read the article, “‘They,’ the Singular Pronoun, Gets Popular,” by Ben Zimmer, published in the April 15, 2015 edition of The Wall Street Journal.[i]

According to Mr Zimmerman, the American Copy Editors Society has become more accepting of ‘they’ as a singular pronoun. Mr Zimmerman goes on to point out “…that ‘they’ is more idiomatic than clunky alternatives that include both genders, as in ‘he or she,’ ‘he/she’ or ‘(s)he’.”[ii]

Other support, or perhaps it should be called affirmation, of the use of ‘they’ as a singular pronoun was reported by Jeff Guo of The Washington Post in his January 8, 2016 article, “Sorry, grammar nerds. The singular ‘they’ has been declared Word of the Year.”[iii]

In his article, Mr Guo reports that the “Singular ‘they,’ the gender-neutral pronoun, has been named the Word of the Year by a crowd of over 200 linguists at the American Dialect Society's annual meeting in Washington, D.C. on January 7^th.” The word, according to the American Dialect Society, as reported in Mr Guo’s article, is a useful “…way to refer to people who don't want to be called ‘he’ or ‘she’."[iv] Mr Guo points out that The Washington Post is already using the singular ‘they’ and has included the word in that form in its Style Guide since 2015.

Mr Guo also quotes Ben Zimmerman, author of the previously referenced WSJ article, as saying at the meeting of the American Dialect Society, over which Mr Zimmerman presided, that people are already using the singular ‘they’ in everyday speech and how the use of the singular ‘they’ also fits well with the new paradigm of gender identity.[v]

Even National Public Radio has weighed in on the matter. In a transcript of a commentary heard on the NPR radio show, “Fresh Air,” on January 13, 2016 by Geoff Nunberg titled, “Everyone Uses Singular 'They,' Whether They Realize It Or Not,”[vi] Mr Nunberg also reports on the decision by the American Dialect Society to make the singular ‘they’ its Word of the Year. He also acknowledges the inclusion of the singular ‘they’ in The Washington Post’s 2015 Style Guide.

Mr Nunberg doesn’t stop with those to contemporary references, however. He points out how the singular ‘they’ also shows up in the works of such literary luminaries from the past as William Shakespeare, Charles Dickens, George Bernard Shaw, and Jane Austin.[vii] Mr Nunberg acknowledges there are, and have been critics of the singular ‘they’ since the Victorian Era when grammarians of that age insisted that ‘he’ stood for both sexes, or as they put it, “the masculine embraces the feminine.”[viii]

“That rule wasn't really discredited until the 1970s, when the second-wave feminists made the generic masculine the paradigm of sexism in language,” wrote Mr Nunberg.[ix]

While the singular ‘they’ is still frowned on by hardcore grammarians, most writers today are willing to use it rather than be stuck using an ungainly ‘he or she’ construct or offending gender neutral advocates by using the feminine embracing ‘he.’[x]

With this new knowledge of the growing acceptance of the singular ‘they,’ I will no longer clutter my writing with unnecessary double singulars like ‘he or she,’ nor will I count the use of the singular ‘they’ against my students when I grade their papers. They will be glad of that.

As always, I remain,

The Exhausted Educator

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[i] Zimmer, Ben. "Can 'They' Be Accepted as a Singular Pronoun?" WSJ. The Wall Street Journal, 15 Apr. 2015. Web. 31 July 2016.

[ii] ibid

[iii] Guo, Jeff. "Sorry, Grammar Nerds. The Singular ‘they’ Has Been Declared Word of the Year." Washington Post. The Washington Post, 08 Jan. 2016. Web. 31 July 2016.

[iv] ibid

[v] ibid

[vi] Nunberg, Geoff. "Everyone Uses Singular 'They,' Whether They Realize It Or Not." NPR. NPR, 13 Jan. 2016. Web. 31 July 2016.

[vii] ibid

[viii] ibid

[ix] ibid

[x] ibid

Early to Bed, Early to Rise, Whose Idea Was That Anyway?

Source: Pixabay CC0 Public Domain

The quote, “Early to bed, early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy, and wise,” is attributed to the venerable Founding Father Benjamin Franklin. Thanks to the PBS Kids show Liberty’s Kids, I will forever hear Ben Franklin speaking with Walter Cronkite’s voice.

For centuries in America, and doubtless elsewhere in the industrialized world, rising early and going to bed early were seen as virtuous traits. Before the advent of electric lights, it was certainly the most common behavior.

Does the idiom still hold true today? Whether it does or not depends on your definition of the three key words in the saying.

The Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines healthy as “enjoying health and vigor of body, mind, or spirit.”[i] This is a somewhat circular definition as it incorporates the word health into the definition of healthy. Perhaps the meaning could be better understood by looking at some synonyms.

According to Merriam-Webster the following are synonyms of healthy: “able-bodied, bouncing, fit, hale, hearty, robust, sound, well, well-conditioned, whole, wholesome, in fine fettle, in shape, in the pink.”[ii]

The definition of wealthy, according to Merriam-Webster, is “having a lot of money and possessions.”[iii] An obvious synonym of wealthy is rich, though many will argue one can be rich in things other than money and possessions.

Wise is an interesting word. It has many different, and sometimes seemingly contradictory meanings. The Merriam-Webster definition of wise I believe Mr Franklin meant in his saying is, “having or showing wisdom or knowledge usually from learning or experiencing many things.”[iv] Based on descriptions of Mr Franklin’s humor, might he have also meant, at times, wise as in “saying things that are rude or insulting.”[v] Perhaps not.

When you do an internet search for whether or not going to bed early and rising early does indeed make one healthier, wealthier, and wiser, a vast array of results appears. Sources from bustle.com to huffingtonpost.com to quora.com all the way to zenhabits.com. In looking through the results of the search, I found the slide show presented or the forbes.com website to the most concise.

Forbes Magazine did a story on its website about the “Benefits of Early Risers.” Among those advantages were earning higher grades in school, being more optimistic, being better planners, and getting better sleep.[vi]

The studies researched by the Frobes article writer showed a direct correlation between rising early and success. So it would seem that Benjamin Franklin’s idea from the 18^th Century still holds true today. Now if only I could convince my students.

As always, I remain,

The Exhausted Educator

---

[i] "Healthy." Merriam-Webster.com. Merriam-Webster, n.d. Web. 29 July 2016.

[ii] ibid

[iii] "Wealthy." Merriam-Webster.com. Merriam-Webster, n.d. Web. 29 July 2016.

[iv] "Wise." Merriam-Webster.com. Merriam-Webster, n.d. Web. 29 July 2016.

[v] ibid

[vi] "Benefits of Early Risers." Forbes. Forbes Magazine, n.d. Web. 29 July 2016.

Yeah or Yay, What’s the Difference?

Source: Pixabay CC0 Public Domain

Quite often I see people use ‘yeah’ in texts and posts when they want to express delight or joy in something. This has long puzzled me as the word those folks mean to use rhymes with ‘day.’

One explanation of the proper use and etymology of the two word can be found in the August 11, 2011 post on the Grammarphobia Blog written by Patricia T. O’Conner and Stewart Kellermany, titled “Yay, yea, and yeah.”

In their post, O’Conner and Kellermany describe the origin of the words and give some historical, literary examples of each words usage. Their research includes references to the Oxford English Dictionary, the American Heritage Dictionary of the English Language (4^th Ed.), and Merriam-Webster’s Collegiate Dictionary (11^th Ed.). One cannot get much more authoritative than those respected reference works.

According to O’Conner and Kellermany, the diphthong in the word ‘yeah,’ is a short ‘e’ such as in the word ‘pet,’ followed by the ‘uh’ sound.[i] The word itself is an adverb meaning ‘yes.’[ii]

The word these enthusiastic folks want to use to show their excited support, according to this source, is spelled ‘yay.’ ‘Yay’ rhymes with ‘day.’ ‘Yay’ is “an exclamation of pleasure, approval, elation, or victory,” according to the American Heritage Dictionary and, an “exclamation of triumph, approval, or encouragement,” per the Oxford English Dictionary.[iii] Both words are said to have derived from the Old English word ‘yea.’

Yet there are those who disagree, such as the author of this post on the EducationBug website, “Yea vs Yeah.” This author argues that yay, yea, and yeah are three separate and distinct words, each with its own meaning and usage.[iv] According to this author, whose name is not provided on the website, the word ‘yay’ is actually a description of a person’s or thing’s shortness of stature, ‘yea’ is the word that indicates approval or excitement, and ‘yeah’ is “an expression of agreement.[v] This article agrees that both ‘yea’ and ‘yay’ rhyme with ‘day,’ but ‘yeah’ is pronounced “yeh.” While acknowledging the common use of ‘yay’ to indicate enthusiasm or excitement, the article insists that this usage is incorrect.

So, though both references do indicate that the word ‘yeah’ is never correct to show enthusiastic approval or excitement, the two disagree as to which, ‘yay’ or ‘yea,’ is correct.

Personally, I prefer ‘yay’ to express joy or excitement. ‘Yea’ is what you say at a meeting to indicate a vote in favor of the motion.

So I guess, as far as I’m concerned, the ‘yays’ have it.

As always, I remain,

The Exhausted Educator

---

[i] Patricia T. O’Conner and Stewart Kellerman, http://www.grammarphobia.com/blog/2011/08/yay-yea-yeah.html

[ii] ibid

[iii] ibid

[iv] http://www.educationbug.org/a/yea-vs--yeah.html

[v] ibid

Hillary Clinton Proves You Can Lie and Cheat Your Way to the Top

Source: Pixabay/Maialisa CC0 Public Domain

Hillary Clinton received the Democratic Party’s nomination for President at the Democratic National Convention this week. Her nomination is an historic event as she will be the first woman at the top of the ticket for either of the two major political parties. Mrs Clinton showed dogged determination in reaching this goal, stopping at nothing to ensure her rise to the top.

There is a long list of acts Mrs Clinton’s detractors provide for why she should never have become the Democratic Party nominee and why she should never be allowed to become President of the United States. First and foremost, these detractors point to the list of the suspicious deaths of those who stood in the way of Mrs Clinton’s ascendancy. Is it possible that these convenient deaths are just a coincidence and that knowing bad things about Mr or Mrs Clinton isn’t really a death sentence? Of course it is possible. But Mrs Clinton’s detractors, without any direct evidence pointing to Mrs Clinton, will insist coincidence doesn’t explain away the forty-plus deaths.

Do Mrs Clinton’s opponents have to go to that extreme to prove the nominee lied and cheated her way to the top? More recent evidence exists. Mrs Clinton clearly lied to the American people and the families of those who died in Benghazi about what happened when Ambassador J. Christopher Stevens was killed.  She lied again in her testimony to Congress about the emails on her private server, as shown by the obvious contradictions between that testimony and the answers she gave in her interview with the Federal Bureau of Investigation. The FBI investigation found that many of the things Mrs Clinton testified to before Congress, while under oath, were lies.

Even more recently, on the eve of the Democratic National Convention, it was learned that the Democratic National Committee had actively conspired to sabotage Senator Bernie Sanders campaign, had worked to convince left-leaning media outlets to favorably report on Mrs Clinton while ignoring or bashing both Bernie Sanders and Donald Trump, among a very long list of other questionable and perhaps illegal practices.

My biggest concern here is how do I explain to my students why Mrs Clinton, who will most probably be the next President, would never have been the nominee in the first place if she’d been held to account for her lying and cheating. The current campaign will be in full swing when school begins in late August, and the in-class news show we watch every day will be full of campaign stories. Some of those stories may make mention of the many dirty tricks attributed to Mrs Clinton during the primary campaign, and the charges being levied against her by the Republicans in Congress. When my students ask me about these things, as they inevitably will, do I respond honestly with the facts, or do I prevaricate and blame all the accusations on politics as usual?

Much as her husband, during his term of office, made it okay in America to lie, deny, and misdirect when found to be in the wrong, Mrs Clinton has set an example that it is okay in America to lie and cheat your way to the top, because if you lie often enough and convincingly enough, you can get away with…just about anything. This is not the lesson I want my students to learn from this Presidential Election.

As always, I remain,

The Exhausted Educator

For Teachers, Summer Passes So Quickly

So Much Summer, So Little Time

Source: Pixabay/Prunkova

For teachers, when the day in June comes for Summer Break to begin, the summer seems to stretch out before us as a long series of lazy days we can fill with trips to the beach, days spent lounging around the house catching up on our favorite television series, vacations with family, writing that book, taking that photography course at the community college, attending a Professional Development conference or two, and working on improving our lesson plans for next school year.

And then there is the list of things around the house and yard we want to accomplish over the summer. The list is usually long and ambitious. Then the first day of summer break arrives.

We get up early because our bodies are still on school time. This doesn’t bother us. We vow to stay on school time all summer because it will allow us to get so much more done.

A comfortable pair of short, a t-shirt, and a pair of flip-flops later and we are booting up the computer on our way to the kitchen to brew our first cup of coffee of the summer. We think of the money we’ll save making coffee at home instead of stopping for a cup at the most convenient fast-food restaurant between home and school and it makes us smile.

Coffee in hand, it is time to check our e-mail, Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and any other social media site we may try to stay current on. (In my case, it is time to work on my next blog post.) We like and share and comment until we’ve had quite enough of the computer for the moment; about one cup of coffee’s worth.

A second cup of coffee in hand, perhaps we venture onto the back porch/deck/balcony to take in the morning and revel in the fact that we are standing there in comfortable clothes instead of standing in the hallway at school waiting for the intake bell to ring. It isn’t too hot in the mornings yet. We decide today would be a good day to pull the weeds sprouting up in the flower bed.

By late morning the heat has arrived and working in the yard loses a lot of the appeal it had earlier. We head inside, switch our coffee cup for a nice cold glass of apple juice over ice and decide to see what’s on television. One hundred channels later, we realize there really is nothing worth watching on television in the morning and launch Netflix to binge watch the shows we missed during the school year while writing lesson plans and grading papers.

Lunch time rolls around. The idea of making lunch doesn’t appeal to us. Neither does cleaning up to go out to lunch. With a laugh at the audacity of our action, we pull up Dominos.com on the computer and order lunch delivered to the house. We order enough so that we can have the leftovers for lunch the next day.

By the end of the week we are growing tired of hanging out at home and look forward to Saturday when our significant other will be on vacation and we will head out for this year’s escape. Oh what a week that is, no matter where we chose to go.

Vacation ends but Fourth of July comes soon on its heels. Then, since this is an election year, the Republican convention, which we as teachers feel obligated to pay some attention to, monopolizes the news for a week. Then the next week the Democratic convention does the same. All the while, we’re working on those summer projects we promised ourselves we’d get done this year.

And, suddenly, July is nearly over. The first of August is only days away. We find ourselves going out for breakfast just because one more morning at home with a toasted English Muffin and a bowl of Special K is unbearable to face. We look at the calendar and realize our days of relative freedom are passing quickly.

We still have some things to look forward to. A couple more trips to the beach, the Summer Olympics, maybe a birthday to celebrate. But reminders that the new school year is fast approaching are numerous.

The text books we brought home so we could begin on our lesson plans for the coming year sit in stark relief on our desks. Reminders in our e-mail that it is time to register for the Summer Curriculum & Instruction Seminar at the local four-year college remind us the summer is quickly waning. The time until the first teacher workday is no longer more than a month into the future, it is only a few weeks away.

But, we’re not ready for summer end. Our lists of what we hoped to accomplish over the summer stare back accusingly at us, more things still to be done than have been crossed off. We shrug and tell ourselves, “There’s always next summer.”

We get up from the table, pour ourselves another cup of coffee, and log into Facebook. Maybe tomorrow we’ll head for the beach. Today we will relax and try not to think about July coming to a close.

As always, I remain,

The Exhausted Educator

Since when was discussing politics with students Verboten?

Source: Pixabay/

With the upcoming election I was recently reminded of something that happened during a previous Presidential Election.

During the Presidential Election campaign in 2008, one of my students asked me to explain the difference in the way the Democratic and Republican Parties think. The question was sparked by a story on our daily in-class news program. The story repeatedly mentioned there were differences between the two parties governing philosophies without really explaining those philosophical differences. I wanted to keep my explanation in simple terms.

This is how I explained it:

Democrats believe that all the money someone earns belongs to the government and the government has the power to decide how much of the money a person earns they should get to keep, confiscating the rest through taxation to pay for running the government, the military, and as many social welfare programs as possible to relieve as many citizens as possible from being personally responsible for their own lives.

Republicans believe that all the money someone earns belongs to the person earning it and the government should only confiscate the minimum amount necessary to pay for essential government services and the military, while limiting spending on social programs that relieve citizens from being personally responsible for their own lives to the smallest amount possible while still providing a safety net for those who are truly in need.

This is an oversimplified explanation and I realize that. However, I was explaining two very different and complex philosophical concepts to a group of seventh graders who didn’t have the context to understand those nuances. They could understand the difference between a political party with a tax-and-spend philosophy and one that prefers to let people keep more of their own money.

What I had not anticipated was the reaction of a parent with a far-left-wing liberal mindset taking me to task for even discussing politics in class. He threatened to complain to the School Board if I did not immediately cease and desist. This parent also informed me that he and his family had always been Democrats and that he didn’t like the fact I’d educated my class about his party’s philosophy.

Notice he did not say I was wrong in how I’d described the Democratic Party philosophy. He simply objected to me explaining the philosophy to my students. What bothered me the most about the email this parent sent is that his wife was a colleague who worked in the same grade on the same hall teaching the same subject I did. I never found out if she was aware of the email.

In the interest of smooth teacher-parent relations I endeavored to answer no more questions about the campaign or the two parties for the rest of the time until the election. When a student would ask, I would answer that I had been asked by a parent not to discuss the election in class so the truth about the parties and the candidates could remain a mystery to my students. On the plus side, I received no more emails.

Was this parent practicing censorship? Were my descriptions of the two parties inappropriate or too on point? Should teachers give honest answers to students’ questions about political parties and candidates for office, or should teachers obfuscate and avoid giving honest answers?

I always tell my students that the opinions I share with them are my own and they are free to agree or disagree as they choose. I encourage them to discuss the question, and my answers, with their parents. And I allow them to come back to class and rebut what I’ve told them, if they have a well prepared rebuttal. “My dad says you’re an idiot,” is not a well prepared rebuttal.

When did schools and classrooms become discussion free zones? It seems to me schools and classrooms should be the one place where students and teachers could engage in such discussions. But then, I ignore most of the memos on how to be Politically Correct.

As always, I remain,

The Exhausted Educator

Is Education Important in Elections?

Source: Pixabay/Zipnon

I was reading the news on FLIPBOARD today and found an interesting article that examined which Republican primary voters were supporting and voting for Donald Trump during the primaries. The story itself was published in the online magazine SALON. The statistic I was most interested in was the education level of the average Trump supporter.

The article bears the rather biased title, “Anatomy of a Trump voter: How racism propelled Trump to the Republican nomination.”[i] There are all kinds of statistics in the story, which was written using data from a survey taken in late January 2016[ii], a point in time just before the launch of the caucus/primary season.

At that time the survey indicated that while Trump had a plurality of support among Republicans, the majority of Republicans preferred one of the other candidates.[iii] The author of the article concentrated on the racial makeup of Trump’s supporters but included in the data he cited the educational level achieved by those supporters as well.

14% of Trump’s Republican supporters, at the time this survey was conducted, had not finished high school. An additional 66% had no college degree. These voters were also primarily white (95%).[iv] Historically, white males with no high school diploma or no college degree have not been reliable voters. According to the US Census Bureau, white men with less than a high school education vote at a rate of 33%. It rises to 47% among white men with a high school diploma and to 57% for white men with some college but no degree.[v] Some very rough, unscientific, unweighted calculations show, historically, only about 45% of the 80% who were supporting Trump actually show up to vote in national elections. Perhaps Mr Trump will bring more of them out this go ‘round.

The number of white female voters with less than a college education who vote regularly is slightly higher than for white men with the same education. This may not help Mr Trump much considering the most recent polls show 69% of women don’t like the Republican Presidential nominee.[vi]

The education group voting in the highest percentage are those with a Bachelor’s degree or higher. These folks, men and women, across all races and ethnicities, age groups, and income levels, vote at a rate of 70% or more.[vii] The bad news for Mr Trump is that those with college degrees tend to have a negative view of him.

According to a Pew Research Poll conducted July 7, voters with at least a Bachelor’s degree are 1.6 times more likely to vote for Clinton as Trump. White voters with at least a Bachelor’s degree are 1.3 times more likely to vote for Clinton.[viii]

Among non-whites, Clinton leads by such large numbers that Trump’s only hope of winning lies with luring those white college-educated voters back into his camp, especially the females.

As history shows, the more education someone has, the more likely they are to vote. With Trump’s history of denigrating the value of a college education and a white-collar career, he has a lot of work ahead of him to convince those voters that he is their best bet.

---

[i] McElwee, Sean. "Anatomy of a Trump Voter: How Racism Propelled Trump to the Republican Nomination." Saloncom RSS. Salon Media Group, Inc., 23 July 2016. Web. 23 July 2016. <http://www.salon.com/2016/07/23/anatomy_of_a_trump_voter_how_racism_propelled_trump_to_the_republican_nomination/>. via Flipboard

[ii] ibid

[iii] ibid

[iv] "Percentage of Voting-age American Citizens Who Say They Vote." News21: Profile of the American Voter. News21, n.d. Web. 23 July 2016. <http://votingrights.news21.com/static/interactives/amvoter/>. Data provided by US Census

[v] ibid

[vi] Paquette, Danielle. "Inside Donald Trump’s Strategy to Win Back Women." Washington Post. The Washington Post, 20 July 2016. Web. 23 July 2016. <https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/wonk/wp/2016/07/20/meet-the-woman-trying-to-fix-donald-trumps-image-with-women/>.

[vii] "Percentage of Voting-age American Citizens Who Say They Vote." News21: Profile of the American Voter. News21, n.d. Web. 23 July 2016. <http://votingrights.news21.com/static/interactives/amvoter/>. Data provided by US Census

[viii] Smith, Samantha. "7-7-2016 2-30-10 PM." Pew Research Center for the People and the Press RSS. Pew Research Center, 07 July 2016. Web. 23 July 2016. <http://www.people-press.org/2016/07/07/2-voter-general-election-preferences/7-7-2016-2-30-10-pm-2/>.

Is there a difference between doing well at school and actually learning?

Source: Pixabay/Geralt

I’ve heard rumors of a time in the past when parents sent their children to school for an education. They expected their children to come out of school knowing more than they did when they went in. At the very least, they expected their children to be able to read, write, and do arithmetic, the so-called “Three Rs.”

At best, parents expected their children to be prepared to go on to college. Perhaps not Duke, or Harvard, or Princeton, but certainly to the local community college down the road and maybe even to a four-year public university.

Parents in this golden age knew it was their responsibility to teach their children to behave appropriately, to be respectful of others, to show good manners and courtesy, and to make sure their children did their homework and studied. These parents also supported the teachers and understood that if their children weren’t doing their work, they weren’t going to get good grades.

These wonderful parents of that by-gone age understood deadlines and did not run to the school board with complaints when their children received zeros for not getting their work turned in on time. The children of these parents learned to be responsible, and learned the consequences of failing to do what they were supposed to do.

Parents like those from days of yore expected their children to actually learn, and knew that self-respect and self-esteem were earned through hard work and success. Their children learned that, along with learning history, math, science, geography, music, art, spelling, grammar, writing, and reading. Those parents sent their children to school expecting them to actually learn.

Ah, but was there ever such a golden age of education. Maybe not for everyone. There was for me. I learned those lessons, often the hard way.

Now that I’m on the other side of the desk, I can tell you things are not like that anymore. There are a few parents left who stick to the old paradigm of education, and I treasure each of them. I can pick their children out within the first week of the start of the school year. Those students become my go-to students because I know they will reliably get their work done, will have studied the material, and can be counted on to give, if not the correct answer, at least a well thought out answer.

On the rare occasion when one of these students gets a bad grade on an assignment, I rarely hear from the parent. The student will come to me and ask me to go over why they missed a problem or an answer to a question. Sometimes the student is even able to convince me that their answer is just as valid as the one I deemed correct. This doesn’t happen often in math or science, but in reading and social studies it does happen.

This first group of students are still in school to learn. Then there is the second group.

In the second group we have the children of parents who send their children to school to do well. Doing well is defined as getting all “A”s on their report cards, tests, assignments, homework, whatever. These parents believe it is the teacher's responsibility to scale the work so as to enable their children to be able to achieve the highest grade possible.

They do not want their children to be challenged, they want their children to believe they are succeeding so the children feel good about themselves. If their children do poorly on an assignment, these parents go straight to the Principal and demand to know what the teacher is doing wrong. These parents are totally unwilling to acknowledge their children’s responsibility for their own learning. If their children do well, the children deserve all the credit. If their children do poorly, it is all the teacher’s fault.

Oftentimes, these are the parents who do the children’s homework for them and get very upset when the homework comes back with mistakes. Then they get even more upset when the child fails the quiz related to the homework. I’ve even had parents like this demand I allow the student to take home their quizzes and turn them in the next day.

When children of parents of this second group of students start missing a lot of homework assignments, the parents have all kinds of excuses. I am not making these up.

“He had ball practice. He’s playing on two teams, you know.”

“Do you know how busy she is after school? She has piano, dance, and gymnastics. When is she supposed to get her homework done?”

“If you can’t get it done in class, you got no business sending it home. It’s your fault, not his.”

“I don’t believe in homework, so I’m not going to make her do it.”

I smile, tell them it is their choice as to what is more important, but their children are still going to get zeros if they don’t do their work.

I, personally, don’t believe homework below the high school level is effective anyway, and the research backs me up on this, so I don’t assign much. My colleagues, who do assign homework, fight this fight every year.

This second group of students aren’t sent to school to learn. They are sent to school to do well. In other words, to get good grades without having to put in much effort or take up too much time outside of school.

There is a third group of students whose parents send them to school because their children get free breakfast and lunch, and are supervised for eight hours a day Monday through Friday. Otherwise, we’d probably never see these students. Their parents see public school as a free day care service and couldn’t care less whether or not their children are learning anything. They don’t care if their children are disrupting class, preventing learning by other students, getting in fights, or failing their grade. All they care about is that five days a week for eight hours a day, their children are someone else’s problem.

I know some of my readers may get up in arms and try to tell me there are no such parents. You will insist all parents care more about their children than that. I wish with all my heart it were true. Sadly, I have seen and heard for myself what I’ve described above.

“I don’t know why you keep calling me. During school, he’s your problem.”

“I’m just her momma. She's gonna do what she wants. Don’t bother me no more about her.”

“I can’t do nothing about him. Look at him. Look at me. You think he's gonna listen to me. When he's at school he's your problem.”

“I don’t wanna keep coming out here to this school, so stop calling me. If she acts up and makes trouble, call the police on her.”

This is just a sample of the things I’ve heard from parents over the years. The heartbreaking part is every one of the children of these parents could, in the right environment, flourish and succeed. I do everything in my power to make my classroom that environment. Most of my colleagues do the same. It can be exhausting, emotionally draining, frustrating, and at times futile, but we keep on trying, day-in-day-out, because each child is worth our best effort, even if their parent doesn’t think so.

Of course, there are children and parents who fall somewhere in between these three groups. And each child has their own unique story, family situation, and history. But when I look out over my classroom, I see the faces of MY KIDS, and I will do everything I can to help MY KIDS learn and succeed.

As always, I remain,

The Exhausted Educator